Miley Cyrus isn’t a mistake.

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Although she have made some, but really; who hasn’t?

My heart aches for Miley in a few ways, but our generation as a whole. You’re overtired of hearing about this… I’m sure, but you have to hear what I have to say, trust me.

Do any of you know the Love of the Lord? If you don’t, you’re missing out. 

His love is agape; a selfless, sacrificial, unconditional love, the highest of any kind. He lived it out by sacrificing himself for our worldy sins. God does not love us because we are lovable or because we deserve his love. If anything, the opposite is true. We are a fallen generation of rebellion & disobedience… Our innermost beings are so corrupted by sin that we don’t even realize to the extent to which we’ve been tainted by sin.

This falls into Miley performing on a stage at the VMA’s. She has only ever known the life in front of camera’s..in front of millions of eyes, hearts, ego’s, producers…..but let me shift your mind, those who are also fathers, daughters, aunts, uncles. She is used to living under pressure & in a way; to make everyone love her. Try to put yourself in her shoes, would you have done anything different? You DON’T know. Every circumstance that has come her way, is & will never be parallel to hers. So as a generation, I’m not asking you to praise her wrong-doings….however what she really needs is LOVE, God’s love through us.

Let me take you another route, God is love. It’s as simple as that. God doesn’t just love, he IS love. How profound! Love permeates his very being & overflows even when he is upset with us. 

Since God is love & it’s his nature to portray it… he lavishes his love to those most undeserving. His love is not romantic, but self-sacrificing. Gods love is personal, he knows each of us individually & far more in-depth then you can ever imagine. His love has a beginning, but the best part? It has no ending–it’s forever. 

At a certain point during the show, I was disgusted. I thought her performance was distressing & I sat there thinking, “This is what young girls have as a role model today?” Then I stopped myself, because it’s not my right to judge her….however I can pray for her.  

Like you, like most people in today’s world (if not all of human-kind at all times during the existence of Earth) we’re all trying to find our place. We all make mistakes. We all do things that make us look rather ridiculous. We try to make things work. Sometimes we fail. Sometimes we fall short…. like Miley, like you, like me.

If the things you did on a day to day basis, were publicized for literally everyone in the WORLD to see….how would you feel? Would you be proud? Would you be disgraced? In your darkest days, moments of despair; where you don’t know the Love of the Lord…. would you want help? Absolutely! We’re human. We need help of our community, we need help of our sisters & our brothers. We are not mean’t to do this alone. 

When were broken & lost….. we should come together as one. So pray. Pray for Miley. Pray for your neighbor who’s about to file for bankruptcy, pray for the guy that lives in an alley & does crack, or the girl that gives her body up to men who pay her.

GUYS, PRAY! & show the LOVE of the Lord to those most undeserving. That’s what God gave you, which is not for you to be selfish with. Stop judging & start loving. I l know it’s hard, I’m not preaching…. I need to do most things like this myself (on a daily basis). It’s an on going journey, but when you’re persistent…. Life is way more beautiful & fulfilling…. & you get to partner with the Lord. Best part of it all.

 

Cheers! Love you guys.

 

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Behind the camera.

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Tran·si·tion  [tran-zish-uhn, -sish-]  noun

1.movement, passage, or change from one position, state, stage,subject, concept, etc., to another; change: the transition from adolescence to adulthood.
 
I know Judging people is far from acceptable, but were ALL guilty. Why am I mentioning this, when it tends to be a sensitive topic? I’m about to tell you…
 
I feel myself in a very transitional period in my life. I recently moved back from living out of state for several months, which was a big deal–leaving my family behind. If you don’t know me very well…trust me by saying leaving family for me is a struggle. It may have had something to do with me turning 25, but who knows.. 🙂

Anyways, I notice myself in a constant state of growth.. not only physically, but also emotionally, intellectually. I have challenged myself more in recent days then ever before. It’s not because I feel the need to jump ship & mark off every adventure off my bucket list or rush to the alter, not at all. But as I become more aware of the world surroundings, relationships, etc….I find I am, we are, SO small in this equation.
 
However I believe in all aspects of life, we all matter. It doesn’t matter if you’ve had four or eight years of education, if you grew up in Pasadena, Cali or the ghetto of Brooklyn, NY… if you wear second hand clothes or if you frequent the nearest Chanel.
 
What I’m trying to say is their are many options in life, endless in fact. One I advise & hope you pursue, is one without judgment. Life is so beautiful, as are you! I mean that. Do I know you? Have I seen the flaws of your outer being that you obsess over? No. But even if we did meet, I promise you wouldn’t feel any different then if I were sitting across from Ryan Gosling…except maybe for a bit less drool.
 
What I’m trying to say is every bit of who you are is what makes you beautiful. I have over the years been diving into writing, as well as photography. Let me explain to you how much WORK goes into the perfect picture. I take photos simply because it’s a passion of mine, always has been. But if you’re entering the next big art competition or want to open up your own gala someday; you’re most likely to end up using Photoshop, or some editing program.
 
How is any of this relevant? It is, I promise. 
 
Your flaws may make you feel ugly, but they’re what make you beautiful. It takes teams, many(grueling) hours, several brands of make ups & makeup artists, hair stylists, the most up to date camera & the list goes on…..just to make you look presentable to the public. But when that’s not enough, we use airbrush & other effects once you’re on the computer screen to perfect you.
 
This then makes young girls today, strive for an unachievable & unreachable dream. Is it worth it? To some, it may be. Kim Karsashian spends three hours sitting in a makeup chair before she’s ready to be “judged”. We are human, we are not to be measured to this unrealistic lifestyle. 
 
I think I’m rambling.
 
Let me close with this, challenge yourself. To find the beauty in your day to day, to help others, to become one with the world. When you do, your life will pour beauty into that of others & the world. The better you feel on the inside, will then show on the outside. So embrace your ugly beautiful flaws. I love them on you & anyone that doesn’t, is just in a different phase of life. They can teach you things, but don’t let their words break you. They can help you more then you know.
 
Fall in love with yourself. 
 

1 John 2:15-17 (ESV)

Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions—is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.

Anxiety away.

I have horrible anxiety, I have for ten years. But I’ve also been fighting every step.

I’ve had a lot of firsts this year & they’ve been challenging, but beautiful.

  • First two airplane rides (4hrs each) alone.
  • Moved out of state (1,800 miles away from home).
  • Drove (alone) from Scottsdale, Arizona to Chicago, IL.

Theses are only a few of them. But let me tell you something, a year ago….I never would have attempted any of these things because of fear, Anxiety.

Did you ever wonder what it would be like if you weren’t you anymore? I do all the time. Fear is like the Ocean. It’s deep & Dark and bigger than all of us. & pain is like a thief in the night. Quiet. Persistent. Unfair. Diminished by time and faith & love.

But we have the ability Instead, to choose a life that is graceful. Fluid. Inspiring. On a good day, it’s almost as if you can fly…. & you know what? I did.

It may have had something to do with the fact that I’m sick of hiding behind something that ISN’T bigger then me. I want to start living & stop hiding. It may be utterly frightening, you may not want to…but you HAVE to. It’s a must. Stop hiding. The world isn’t judging you. They’re cheering you along. The universe wants you to enjoy it, but respect it at the same time. It’s here for you. Look around, breathe in…breathe out & trust.

Trust in the Universe.

Trust in Hope.

Trust in Love.

Trust in yourself.

Trust in God.

 

Life has only begun…. 

 

A little longer.

The real question isn’t, Do you think that you deserve happiness? Not at the core of it. The real question is, Do you think that other people are worth it?

Do you think that other people– whether you know them or not– are worth it? Worth your time. Worth your energy. Worth it when you’re tired. Worth it when you’re the one who feels like falling apart.

This world is a constant dance of standing close to the edge of giving up on one another. Of turning our backs. Of looking away. Of saying, whether verbally or not, “that person is not worth my precious time.” But I don’t want to give up on people, no matter how hard it gets. I don’t want to be the one to say, “that human is too messy for my liking” or “that heart is too mangled.” I don’t want life to suddenly work in a way where we turn inward, and we focus on all of our junk, and we think we need to be “fixed” and “happy” and “whole” before we can make a dent in the life of someone else. That’s a lie. The chance to validate someone, lift someone, be there for someone started yesterday. Is it worth it to look up?

I don’t know if anyone has ever thought to tell you but you deserve happiness. You deserve to know that life means something. I would cry if you weren’t here. And the world would miss out on the purpose you brought here in your arms. You deserve happiness. You deserve happiness. You deserve happiness. I want to speak that into your bones until you believe it. And you feel it. And you get strong enough to tell someone else that they deserve the very same thing.

You deserve happiness. And you will always be worth it to me.

I’m single.

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Yes, single. & that’s probably the most miserable thing about my life that I can admit. Not because I am pining to meet you, that’s not it. You can take your time. Really. I am taking mine. But it’s miserable because being single has made me feel wrong to be waiting for you.

I’m the girl who people want to push into relationships. They want to set me up on countless dates. They want to survey me from every angle and determine what exactly is going wrong with this situation because& I should have no problem meeting someone already.

I get put into a pile of girls who are waiting on their rose ceremonies. They are already wondering if he will open every door & call instead of text. & I don’t care about any of that. Really. Your face at my door will be enough after all of this.

I’ve had to back out carefully from these boxes of what people think it means to be “single & somehow waiting” because they will suffocate me & I won’t remember how to want you any longer.

 I’m caught in a world that tells me never to settle & then double backs to tell me that I shouldn’t have too high of expectations. That people are imperfect. & fairy tales aren’t reality. I know that. I have been perfectly in love with people who never gave me a fairy tale but I would still be coming back to the blue in their eyes if they gave me the option to stay.

Darling, I’m not looking for a Cinderella story. I’m not looking for you to call me instead of text me. I am not going to chastise for you for improper grammar (though words spelt out fully in text messages are SO much sexier). I haven’t married you in my mind already (don’t worry) simply because I don’t even know if you like peanut butter & I think I have to know that first. & let’s just be honest, I would be content with a pixie stick and a ring made out of a straw wrapper if it meant we could focus on faithfulness instead of fluff.

I want to eat breakfast at my wedding. I want to laugh from my belly. I want to celebrate the people who brought you to me at long last. I could care less about how we decorate the room. Let’s just throw toilet paper up into the rafters. A pair of Nikes instead of heels would fit me just fine. I just want to be with you forever. & maybe dance that entire night. & I just want to never stand at a crossroads that makes us both wonder if someone already walked away without telling the other person honestly.

 I’ve been stuck in the middle of unfaithful things before & it is truly the most sunken feeling in the world. To learn your own body is a wrecking ball & that your worth can rest in the hands of someone who never valued what it took for you to build into the person standing before them that day. It’s like two bodies clinging to each other, hoping they can keep one another from walking out the door but unable to open their eyes to see that Trust broke all the windows, and kicked down all the doors, when she broke loose and left them.

Once Trust walks away, & secrets build up in her absence, you’re rarely getting back to a place where Commitment is the centerpiece on a table first set by Love.

That’s my worry. Beyond where I will meet you or how you will think to hold my hand, my worry comes from living in a world where infidelity is a light and laughable thing. Where people call into the radio to debate on whether they should have sex with strangers when their husband won’t touch them any longer. & cheating is expected if your spouse turns out to be boring or bitchy or imperfect in a way that doesn’t serve you.

My worry comes from living in a world where “goodbye” is rarely ever meant because technology has made it easier for us to hold on to old flames just a little longer. & we make movies out of unresolved love stories that leave other girls and guys standing like fools at the altars, left not chosen because their partner’s heart never found the endurance it would take to let an old love die. & so they stopped being honest. & they let it get too far. My worry comes from knowing we still get weak in the knees & we wonder “what if” because it excites us & it gives us adventure. But it breaks our hearts all over again. All at the same time.

 I’m not asking for a fairy tale.

 But I expect that both of us are going to show up to this thing like gladiators. With shields. & swords. & cool armor. & all the things it would take to fight for one another, over & over & over again. You, my dear, are already my favorite thing to fight for. Did you know that? I don’t even need to know the color of your eyes or the quirk in your laugh to know I’m going to fight for you like crazy.

& every single day I grow stronger as a woman, and a leader, and future Someone to you someday but everyday until then I am reminded of just how fragile you already are to me. Just because the human heart is resilient and pumped full with fighter’s blood doesn’t mean it was stitched to handle the tumble dry setting of someone who stumbles over when it means to be faithful. I don’t want to put you through that. I can’t bear to put you through that.

I can’t bear to see your back sunken over and tears running down your face on the day I betray you with flesh. & so I’d rather wait here, not giving trial runs and free subscriptions to my heart out up until the day you come around. I’d rather stay here & learn the crooks and corners of this heart of mine for myself before I ever think you could attempt to understand it too. I don’t need to know your every footstep. I don’t care all the places you’ve been. I just want a loyalty that this world won’t give us.

That’s worth waiting for. It’s worth sacrificing everything for it.

I might be the ogre of singledom. I might be the girl who owns the #foreveralone hash tag and gets it screen printed on tees to sell in the heart of New York City. I might never get the rose from another guy for as long as it takes for you to get here. I. Don’t. Care. Because if and when I find you, that is it.

You get all my human affections. You get all of me. A deal is a deal is a deal. I’m yours.

Guard your heart.

Guard Your Heart

November 29, 2011 at 3:28pm

In order to run our race and finish our course, we need to understand that God has an appointed time that is usually different to our due date, and secondly we MUST GUARD OUR HEARTS!

 

One of the greatest challenges that we have is to keep our hearts pure and uncluttered from toxic emotions that can sabotage our destiny.

 

Proverbs 4:23 reminds us to “keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life.”

 

Quite a sobering thought, isn’t it? ALL of our issues flow from our heart and instead of blaming everyone else or our external circumstances for the situation we are in, we need to look within and examine our own hearts.

 

If we can learn to take personal responsibility for the condition of our heart, then we will inevitably last longer. A regular spiritual heart check up should be something we submit ourselves to in order to avoid a spiritual heart attack.

 

Things like offense, unforgiveness, bitterness, lust, greed, envy, guile, anger, and indifference will clog up your spiritual arteries and eventually your heart will no longer beat for what God’s heart beats for.

 

A toxic heart will end up poisoning you. It will take you out of the race before the devil or any other person does.

 

Develop the habit of working on your own heart daily. Allow God to heal your wounded heart and tend diligently to its condition. Keep a soft heart towards God and an open heart to people.